My Mystery Lover

Sundown, you better take care if I find you been sneakin' down my backstairs...

PAWS AT MY FEET AND WONDER!

Remarkable discovery made by doctor Ben G. Hager II, reveals how far back I go.

POUT OUT!

How come this old hippo got a big hoedown for Respect for the Aged Day on September 22nd and this poor old widow woman didn't get so much as an email or a "howdy doody"?

HOLD ONTO YOUR TEETH

The above is an artist's rendering of what I'll look like not too many years hence. Save yourselves now, while there's still time. This tale, told by a tooth, is straight from the horse's mouth.

What a Day of Rejoicing That Will Be (For SOME of Y'all)

Here's an old boyfriend a mine singing one of my favorite tunes. He calls me "Thelmer" in it--he dedicates it to Thelmer--because that's what I told him my name was when we met up in a bar.

Young Trixie Goforth Does the Google

Here's me way back when. Even as a young girl, I was doin' the Google. I was doin' the Google before it was invented. I had one of the very first laptops. Don't look at that little piece of my step-ins hanging out my britches leg, you naughty. I may look like I was hot to trot, but even then I was good to Choose Virtue. Leastways that's how I remember it.